Perspectives

By | March 31, 2017

Concerning different situations in life and how people see them differently, there are so many. The scenario I picked from personal experience is the perfect example on how people perceive certain situations.
There was this military family I once knew. They had a set of twins turning three years old at the time. The husband was the only provider for the family and they obtained an apartment that had several hazardous issues that the manager did not want to repair. It was a duplex, and they were the only ones with children. The neighbors were very distant and mean so they just kept to themselves mostly.
The wife kept the apartment very clean and took care of the children every day. One day she was cleaning out a closet to make room for more stuff and she came across a bag full of clothes that they were looking for. She called the previous renters to tell them that she found it, and it would be on the patio if they wanted to come get it.
She got a call from the manager of the apartment saying that the neighbors wanted them to immediately remove the bag from their porch. They were already in bed by the time she had received the call so she told her husband when he woke up in the morning to just the bag in the house. He forgot and just went to work. She was not feeling that good for the past few days and she let the housecleaning down some.
Later that day she got a knock on the door, and it was Child Protective Services (CPS). She was shocked when she heard that someone had filed a claim against her. The allegations were outrageous. They said that her husband and her were doing drugs, throwing a party every night and giving beer to their three-year-old twins, but the first allegation bothered her the most and that was that she had a dirty porch. The house was a little messy, and she and her husband was drug tested. CPS had to by law to tell her husband??™s commanding officer. Within a day and a half the entire unit knew. They did not know about the neighbors. They just assumed that the family led a secret life. After that they were no longer getting invitations to military social gatherings, and they were so shocked that over a bag of clothes on a porch somebody took it as far as they could to ruin their lives. They started fighting all the time because they were afraid of losing their children.
The different views were that the people that heard the story assumed it was true. The family of the family knew it was not true because they knew them. CPS could not find any evidence to prove that those allegations were in fact true so they dismissed the case.
With what little money they had saved, immediately moved and started getting their lives back to the way they were. I chose this scenario because how easy a situation could be different just by someone saying otherwise. Rumors have destroyed many people. Most people do not take the time to see underneath, we as humans are very quick to be judgmental from something simple like seeing or listening to something.
Not one person in that unit came up to that family and asked them how they were doing. If what they heard was true. The family would have told them about the grudge the neighbors had against them and they had no idea why someone would dislike someone so bad that they would try to take away the most precious things in their lives.
In this event, there is no personal belief, religious belief, or cultural belief, that could influence how it was interpreted because nobody knew the family but me. The wife and I could not figure out which neighbor did it or even wrap our heads around a time or situation that would make them hate the family that much. This event can be interpreted in many ways because of the influential moods or a person??™s personality. When I first heard the story she was very upset crying, freaking out, because she did not want to lose her children to lies. So at that time I interpreted this event because of her emotions at the time, like her children were going to be gone tomorrow because someone called with an outrageous story.
I got off the phone with her and laid in bed thinking. I called her the next morning after it happened to hear the story again when she was not so upset. I told her that if people had their children taken away just by what someone said to CPS, nobody would have children. I explained to her that they have to find proof and I knew they wouldn??™t.
That event change the way I see situations because of how they were treated after CPS came, and they did nothing wrong. I try my hardest to remind myself when I am in any situation that I should not be judging a book by its cover until I know for a fact the situation.
When I put on the news at night that??™s all you hear is the story and the opinions of the people pertaining to the story. For example a mother was charged with neglect after locking her children in a room for over a week without food or water. The people ate that up with bad comment about what kind of person she was, just too discover days later that she was completely gone mentally and did not have the means or insurance to seek help. After that the people??™s comments of hatred remarks turned into pity and empathy for the mother.
I encounter a perspective event at least twice a week if not more, and it takes remembering this occasion, to just look past what you??™ve seen or heard to see what is the real story or if what you saw is real. I do it now because it saves them from harsh unnecessary remarks and bad titles. I believe once the damage is done it is done. If more people focused on seeing the true perspective of everyday events, there would be many innocent people keeping their innocence.

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